Ephesians 4:30-32

New King James Version (NKJV)
30 And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. 31 Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. 32 And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.

There are some folks whom I would like to grab by the shoulder, shake, look deep into their eyes and ask, “What are you so angry about?” You know the kind of people I mean. They are never happy, always grumpy. They move through life with a chip permanently glued to their shoulders. Their anger erupts in unexpected and often unexplainable. Afterwards, they can ask, “Where did that come from?” Sadly, if confronted,  they would likely simply look back at me and say “I’m not angry.” 


I agree with Joyce Meyer, “Many people ruin their health and their lives by taking the poison of bitterness, resentment and unforgiveness.” This is the condition of racists, homophobes, and anti-whatevers. The mere appearance of some people or even their mention in conversation brings out bitterness and anger. It seems useless to point out that these feelings are the result of unresolved unforgiveness. Notice how Paul identifies forgiveness as the antidote for “all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking.” 

As we move through life, we are hurt by people. These are often the kind of people with whom we are not “allowed” to be angry. The first place to look is the mirror. Almost all of us need to forgive ourselves for something. Next look to parents, teachers, preachers, bosses, even old playmates and friends. Buried hurts produce anger and bitterness that can only be cured by forgiveness. Our anger and bitterness is hurting no one but ourselves. The offending person likely does not remember the offense and may not even remember us. 

Once the offense is identified, we need to decide to forgive. The feelings of anger and bitterness may not vanish immediately but identification and the decision to forgive are the first steps. I find it useful periodically to spend some time considering my anger and bitterness, identify the sources and make a list of those I need to forgive. Don’t be surprised if the same names come up repeatedly. Unforgiveness is often a continuing exercise. Take that list and symbolically destroy it: burn it, crumble  it up and throw it away. A physical symbol to represent our decision is helpful.

Why are you so angry?

Consider why, forgive and be blessed.

Nick

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