“But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ For whatever is more than these is from the evil one. Matthew 5:37 NKJV
Communication is tough but we make it harder than it needs to be. We can’t seem to just say what we mean. Sometimes it’s political correctness that muddles our speech, but mostly it’s just cowardness that keeps us from saying what we mean. We do great damage to our relationships for fear of hurt feelings. Sadly, we have no problems telling others what we would not say directly to the one involved.
Trust is necessary to avoid these problems. If we really trust someone, we have no fear of losing their friendship or love if we are honest with them. In fact, complete honesty builds trust and strengthens relationship. But trust is extremely fragile.
Years of honest communication and the trust established can be lost in an instant. A lie will do it obviously. But even a little less than a lie can hurt. We don’t think of flattery as a lie, but it is and it can kill trust. So can a broken promise. It doesn’t help that we had every intention of doing what we said, when we said it. If we don’t follow through, we kill trust. This is a frequent mistake we make as parents. Even off hand comments can be taken as promises by the young. Be careful with promises.
Silence can kill trust. Sometimes we need to say something and our silence can speak volumes. Words can often be misunderstood but silence is really subject to a multitude of interpretations.
Strangest of all, we destroy trust when we say “yes” but should have said, “no.” we don’t like to disappoint so we agree to do things we should never attempt. We find ourselves I over our heads and struggling to accomplish more than we are able. We don’t do anyone a favor when we agree to do something we don’t have the time, talent or desire to accomplish.
Trust is precious. Simple honesty can help us preserve it.
Nick
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